NEWBORN

You were different to the others,
you looked me in the eye and nodded.
You didn’t look away from the wounds
only touched them with your eyes and stayed.
You asked me questions that should not be asked
and when I would not answer, asked again
in different words until I asked you to go
but you came back and cooked for me sometimes
and cleaned up when I was sick – while I
played music to keep the questions at bay
but I answered them for myself anyway.
I slid away from the touch of you, sometimes
I would not answer when you knocked at my door.
I fought a silent bitter battle with you
and you fought back to tame me
as you would tame a wild animal
by caring for, by constancy –
though you never spoke of love.
One day I woke up and you were gone
as I knew that one day I would wake and
I was well prepared for the disappointment
but it did not mitigate the force of the loss.
Your absence broke all the walls
your presence could not breach
and I found all my wounds were healed excepting
this new one and my tears tumbled out of
the eyes you had cracked with your questions
and your absence showed me finally what I wanted.
I came to you for the first time whole
and I offered you my soul. You took it
to your heart as if I were a newborn.